Troy McNaughtonTop Coffee Gripes
April 4th 2006 00:19
Let's have one more whinge before I hit you with another review of a favourite Sydney nook (or cranny). We've all got pet peeves and not all of them are monopolised by Starbucks, so let's compile, compare and contrast, and generally share the spleen around.
AMY'S TOP FIVE
1. Nobody likes cold foam - a product of letting the milk jug sit there until someone wants a coffee - WRONG.
Punishment: lick the crusty burnt milk off the outside of the jug.
2. Tiny weeny coffee cups - unless you're an expresso drinker, for $3 or $3.50 you expect something that will last you more than two sips.
Punishment: Trial by Ikea.
3. Fully refined sugar - it's too strong and it's just too dang white.
Punishment: Buried alive in raw sugar.
4. Too much sediment at the bottom of the cup - clean your coffee machine!!!
Punishment: Eat sand. Mmm crunchy.
5. Burnt, nasty, bitter coffee. There is NEVER any excuse.
Punishment: Banishment to coffee hell - the Land of Decaff, where you still get scalded by overheated milk but never get that buzz you can't learn to live without. Then beheading. By teaspoon.
Please contribute your greatest gripes by commenting below. You do need to be a member, but setup is quick and easy and you needn't start your own blog if you have someone in your life who will listen to this kind of rubbish from you.
Vent that spleen! (I'll clean it up afterwards)
AMY'S TOP FIVE
1. Nobody likes cold foam - a product of letting the milk jug sit there until someone wants a coffee - WRONG.
Punishment: lick the crusty burnt milk off the outside of the jug.
2. Tiny weeny coffee cups - unless you're an expresso drinker, for $3 or $3.50 you expect something that will last you more than two sips.
3. Fully refined sugar - it's too strong and it's just too dang white.
Punishment: Buried alive in raw sugar.
4. Too much sediment at the bottom of the cup - clean your coffee machine!!!
Punishment: Eat sand. Mmm crunchy.
5. Burnt, nasty, bitter coffee. There is NEVER any excuse.
Punishment: Banishment to coffee hell - the Land of Decaff, where you still get scalded by overheated milk but never get that buzz you can't learn to live without. Then beheading. By teaspoon.
Please contribute your greatest gripes by commenting below. You do need to be a member, but setup is quick and easy and you needn't start your own blog if you have someone in your life who will listen to this kind of rubbish from you.
Vent that spleen! (I'll clean it up afterwards)
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Comment by Mythtery
The first and most obvious gripe would be weak cups of warm foam - coffee is supposed to have FLAVOUR yet so many baristas seem to have slept thru that part of their training.
Punishment - forced standing up for 24 hours with NO coffee!
2ndly, flat whites with no crema at all - idiots.
Punishment - writing out 500 lines of "I must stop ripping off the customers"
And also, you should try Doppio's in Pitt St - THEY know how to make a good, quick coffee that's always excellent.
Comment by rachel
I also have a few gripes, mostly about the way the coffee is made at the cafe where I work... For safety reasons I shall not mention which cafe is this, as I will be hunted down, and forced to lick the crusty burnt milk on the outside of the jug.
Gripe 1.) The coffee grinder left continuously on; surely it is obvious that the fresher the coffee is, the better it tastes? And the noise is about as atmospheric as listening to howling cats, or nails down a chalkboard.
Gripe 2.) Flat whites with heads like a cappucino. If I wanted froth, I would have ordered a latte.
There's also a great tiny little coffee shop, off King St, which I would love to recommend if I could just remember what the hell it's called...! Starts with a V I think... On the corner of Erskineville Road and Wilson Street... Anyone know the one I mean?
Comment by Sara
Comment by amy