Troy McNaughtonBad Managers in Sydney--Part One
November 15th 2007 08:36
You’ve probably worked for at least one or two bad managers. Here’s my first snapshot of a manager I’ve had the misfortune to work for in Sydney:
Bad Manager #1
Tempesta Omnivore, Call Centre Manager.
Call centres should be a temporary stop on one’s career path, someplace where you spin your wheels for a year or two whilst writing your novel or waiting for your big acting break. In return for working for shit money in a relatively comfortable environment, you should answer a reasonable number of calls and honestly try to provide polite, efficient service. You should not have to suffer verbal abuse from screaming menopausal witches who want you to give them information about their husband’s account, or ask permission from your team leader before going to the toilet.
Our little cubicle farm wasn’t so bad, as call centres go. We had an interesting mix of employees: gay men, older women, backpackers, budding fashion designers, out-of-work actors, aspiring writers, and young people who were thrilled to be working someplace other than Pizza Hut. The pay wasn’t great, but we had a decent incentive system and monthly barbecues with free piss.
Tempesta Omnivore, a career call centre manager, changed all that.
Did anyone see Eddie Perfect’s routine on call centres in “Drink Pepsi, Bitch”? I think Eddie Perfect must have worked in one of Tempesta Omnivore’s call centres.
Overweight, hard-faced, aggressive, thirtyish, and single, Tempesta tried to compensate for her plainness of face and figure by squeezing her size-18 body into size-16 designer suits and separates. Tempesta jacked up the KPI’s, took away the incentives, and fired all managers who knew more than she did. Then she embarked on a series of affairs with her subordinates, including a married bisexual.
When the married bisexual went back to his wife and baby (no, I’m not kidding), Tempesta began firing anyone she thought might be laughing at her behind her back, which was pretty much everybody. I managed to find a real job before she sacked me.
Can you top this? Please comment.
Bad Manager #1
Tempesta Omnivore, Call Centre Manager.
Call centres should be a temporary stop on one’s career path, someplace where you spin your wheels for a year or two whilst writing your novel or waiting for your big acting break. In return for working for shit money in a relatively comfortable environment, you should answer a reasonable number of calls and honestly try to provide polite, efficient service. You should not have to suffer verbal abuse from screaming menopausal witches who want you to give them information about their husband’s account, or ask permission from your team leader before going to the toilet.
Our little cubicle farm wasn’t so bad, as call centres go. We had an interesting mix of employees: gay men, older women, backpackers, budding fashion designers, out-of-work actors, aspiring writers, and young people who were thrilled to be working someplace other than Pizza Hut. The pay wasn’t great, but we had a decent incentive system and monthly barbecues with free piss.
Tempesta Omnivore, a career call centre manager, changed all that.
Did anyone see Eddie Perfect’s routine on call centres in “Drink Pepsi, Bitch”? I think Eddie Perfect must have worked in one of Tempesta Omnivore’s call centres.
Overweight, hard-faced, aggressive, thirtyish, and single, Tempesta tried to compensate for her plainness of face and figure by squeezing her size-18 body into size-16 designer suits and separates. Tempesta jacked up the KPI’s, took away the incentives, and fired all managers who knew more than she did. Then she embarked on a series of affairs with her subordinates, including a married bisexual.
When the married bisexual went back to his wife and baby (no, I’m not kidding), Tempesta began firing anyone she thought might be laughing at her behind her back, which was pretty much everybody. I managed to find a real job before she sacked me.
Can you top this? Please comment.
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